Faith in Marriage: Hope, Charity, and Christ Create Lasting Love
Having faith in marriage is different way of believing than how we grew up believing love should be easy—that if we marry the right person, everything will simply fall into place. Movies, books, and culture reinforce the idea that true love is effortless. But real marriage, especially a Christ-centered marriage, tells a very different story.
Marriage isn’t sustained by emotion alone. It is sustained by faith.
Disclaimer & Terms and Conditions
The Myth of Effortless Love
The hallmark romances and love stories often tell us that if someone is the right person for us, love should come naturally and easily. That we should simply fall into love—and if that’s the case, then it makes sense that we could also fall out of love. This idea quietly suggests that marriage should be the same: effortless, smooth, and free of struggle.
But that isn’t true.
Marriage is hard. It is a choice.
It is work, and at times it is exhausting. When you add life’s challenges—stress, loss, financial strain, parenting, illness—it can feel ten times harder. So why in the world would people choose to get married, let alone stay married?
Why Marriage Is Worth the Work
Because “happiness in marriage and parenthood can exceed a thousand times any other happiness.” (James E. Faust) Through the awful, the heartache, and the chaos, the relationship that is built when both people choose to work becomes one of the most beautiful, special, and sacred things a person can be part of. When two people decide to come together and keep working, there is very little they cannot overcome.
Faith Is an Action Word
So where does faith come in?
Faith is an action word, just like love. You cannot have faith without doing something.
Faith is to believe—to have confidence and trust—in something greater than yourself, such as Jesus Christ. Through that confidence and trust, we act on our belief that Christ will help us. We pray, fast, read our scriptures, and attend church, to name a few. These are not habits of routine; they are true acts of faith.
How Faith, Hope, and Charity Work Together
Intertwined with faith are hope and charity. When you have faith, you hope for things to come to pass. When you trust in the Lord and see those hopes fulfilled, your faith is strengthened. As your faith grows, so does your love for others—charity, the pure love of Christ.
When we love and serve others, we strengthen our faith, which deepens our hope. It becomes a never-ending, refining cycle.
How Faith Strengthens a Marriage
Faith is an individual journey. You cannot force your spouse to walk the same path you are on, but you can lead by example.
Read your scriptures daily. Pray morning and night—and quietly in your heart throughout the day. Attend church. Plan wholesome recreation. Attend the temple as often as possible.
None of these things guarantee that your spouse will change—but they will change you. They will strengthen your faith and expand your love for those around you. A loving, faithful, and positive person has a far greater and more lasting impact on the world than someone who is angry or bitter.
Building Faith Together as a Couple
What about building faith together when both spouses desire it?
Your relationship with Jesus Christ must always come first. Continue doing the individual things that strengthen you personally. The second most important relationship is your marriage—even before your children.
Through a Christ-centered marriage, you model love, commitment, repentance, and forgiveness for your children. It is one of the greatest examples you can give.
Pray together morning and night. Discuss what you are reading in the scriptures. Plan fun and wholesome recreation together. Attend the temple together as often as possible.
The temple is truly one of the greatest sources of peace and healing—especially when attended consistently.
The Healing Power of the Temple
What is taught and felt in the temple can soften the hardest hearts. It can heal broken hearts and bring a peace and joy that cannot be found anywhere else.
The temple is the greatest therapy session a person can attend.
Love, Forgiveness, and Lasting Marriage
These acts of faith bring hope and love into your individual life, which then trickle into your marriage. Love enables forgiveness—and forgiveness is needed often in marriage.
You will hurt one another. Say things you regret. You will make mistakes.
President Gordon B. Hinckley once taught:
“If husbands and wives would only give greater emphasis to the virtues that are to be found in one another and less to the faults, there would be fewer broken hearts, fewer tears, fewer divorces, and much more happiness in the homes of our people.”
Faith at the Center of Marriage
Faith is one of the greatest characteristics a person can develop. With faith comes hope, charity, patience, virtue, long-suffering, forgiveness, and the attributes of Christ that bring peace and joy into both life and marriage.
When God is placed at the center of a marriage, it becomes not merely “a matter of romance … but an anxious concern for the comfort and well-being of one’s companion.” Any husband who will make his wife’s comfort his first concern – and any woman who will do the same for her husband- will remain in love throughout their lives and into eternity. – Gordon B. Hinckley
Final Thoughts
Strive to build your faith so that your love for your spouse can grow through our Savior, Jesus Christ, and so that we may become more concerned for our spouse than for ourselves.
If your marriage feels heavy right now, begin with one small act of faith today—say a prayer, open the scriptures, choose kindness, or serve your spouse quietly. Over time, those small, faithful acts can soften hearts, strengthen love, and invite Christ more fully into your marriage. I know this to be true, because I have done it myself. There is nothing that faith in Jesus Christ can’t fix.
